Are You A victim?…

“Everything always happens to me”, “Why Me”, “I have the worst luck”…

Last week I was told again that the likelihood of me getting back into competition is slim to none…And my initial thought was “it’s unfair”, or something similar to that effect.11144950_10205995678002851_6937707197164708269_n

But that is bullshit…

For every person who makes it in the sporting world, there are 100 who could have made it, but they didn’t have the support, they got injured, they had bad timing, they didn’t have the mental capacity to cope with pressure etc etc.

For every one singer that makes it, 100 have the talent, but are not slim enough, or have the wrong image, or the wrong support, or are too like someone who already made it.

It’s human instinct though to play the victim… I hear it all the time, and it’s one thing to think it, it’s quite another to verbalise it…

I do feel like every time I get almost to the point where I feel recovered, that I fall almost as far back down, but that’s nothing particular to me, that’s just life in general.

Yet, people make themselves out to be somehow the only one who faces tough times, like it’s the world against them, and everyone else has it easy.

They don’t, you aren’t special.

I talked for ten minutes to the person I talk the most to, and she said “and what do you want me to do about it?”…I laughed because it’s so true…

People tend to share their problems, as if that might solve them, but that time might be better spent looking for a solution.15233550_10209207006444055_1453880822_o

So I am making more changes…in the hopes that each time I get almost better, the better will last longer, and the fall back down will be less, until one day when people say that my injury will stop me, I won’t even have the thought that it is unfair, or even possible.

Mental strength is so much more important that physical strength in so many ways.

I was thinking about this on the weekend…The physio asked me if the pain was as bad as when I first tore the tendons…and I tried to think about it…

The interesting thing about pain is, that if you think back to the worst emotional pain you have ever been in, you can still remember the physical feeling of it…BUT, if you remember back to the worst physical injury you have ever had, you can remember how that made you feel emotionally, but you cannot remember the physical pain.15515835_10209375636019689_649566707_o

I read about this yesterday, and found that “Memories Trigger Emotional Pain But Not Physical Pain: Recalling the time you broke your leg will not make your leg hurt but recalling the time you felt rejected by your high-school crush will cause you substantial emotional pain. Our ability to evoke emotional pain by merely remembering distressing events is profound and stands in stark contrast to our total inability (thankfully) to re-experience physical pain.” (psychology today)…

So my answer was, “I can’t remember”…and it was true.

Normally I can block out pain, I learnt to do it. You have to train your mind to focus on something else…But sometimes the pain is so strong I can’t, and then my emotional strength for everything else is also reduced. If I burn the toast, or spill my coffee, it will be the worst thing that could have happened ever…and I will overdramatise even the simplest situation…

Also human nature…

But there is one thing about human nature that is stronger than all the rest, and that is our mental capacity to keep going, if we really want to!

So if I can’t remember the physical pain, then it never really existed, and if I want something badly enough, then there is always an exception to the rule…

Don’t play the victim…As my mum says, “just get on with it!”

“quando nós queremos muito uma coisa, fazemos tudo para o conseguir! 🙂 🙂 “


One thought on “Are You A victim?…

  1. “People tend to share their problems, as if that might solve them, but that time might be better spent looking for a solution.” So. True. I need a blatantly honest friend like yours in my life! I am definitely wallowing in pity about my current ptsd/fear of horses/preggo limitations since my bad accident & surgery last summer. Thank you for this post, I can relate a lot… remembering emotional trauma more than physical pain, and finding it very hard to let the little things go as a result of still processing the BIG thing that happened. Sometimes I find myself truely getting rip roaring pissed at myself for being such a huge whiner, and you are right, sometimes we just need to suck it up and trudge on!


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